Could Megxit be about Self-care or are the Royal ‘Exiles’ losing all perspective?

The whole Megxit debacle has gone on for a while now.

To everyone’s shock and dismay, including Her Majesty the Queen, Prince Harry and Meghan made a bombshell announcement at the start of the year.

It has been an interesting deviation from cheap headlines and political bores like Brexit.

The media in most places, have not been that forgiving of their surprise plans.

If Megxit were a boxing match, I would have said there have been a few knockout punches from the Crown.

But with all the media circus going on, (and I have had my own private opinions admittedly), could it be that we should really take this Megxit thing at face value and accept it it for what it is… ?

Put it another way. Prince Harry (we would respectfully call him Harry in this post), was 12 when his dear mother died.

I remember watching the funeral on TV that day. I was a very young adult then, but I do remember remarking how very ‘comported’ the young princes seemed to be.

Their heads were bowed throughout, from what I remember. You could see however that they looked really sad, of course. But not a visible tear escaped down either of four cheeks.

I knew that the blue royal blood in them, plus probably some grooming for the day’s event, in addition to the Brit stiff upper lip had done well. Done well in preventing any sign of rib cracking wails or even any sedate emotional display not befitting of heirs to the throne.

I did think how incredibly hard it would have been to walk behind their mother’s hearse in public eye while millions watched on, and having to hold every emotion like a pressurised stuffed turkey!

Unfortunately, stiff upper lips do not produce stiff mental health. In other words, some 20 years later or so, Harry began to open up about his mental health struggles he had endured as a result of his mother’s death.

The timing of his mother’s death did not help matters either. Of course there is never a good timing, if you are getting my drift.

But overnight, the fairytale princess of the 20th century, ‘Princess’ Diana, was inexplicably dead. I cannot fathom the princes’ shock and disbelief on hearing this news so suddenly.

Paparazzi became a new word (for me at least) in the dictionary. Paparazzi became the chief culprits for robbing humanity an incredible figure.

Furthermore, as the facts of the tragedy unfolded, so too were the conspiracy theories of ‘what really happened?’

Yet for everyone, once the flowers and wreaths were withered and faded, life slowly resumed. But not so for the sons Diana left behind.

Especially Harry.

Some years ago, Harry disclosed that those 20 years after his mother’s death, he refused to think about it all. The impact of this, is that he did not grieve but possibly stayed in perpetual shock. To his detriment and mental health demise.

This trauma of his past has never completely forsaken Harry. There are probably many thoughts he has had to deal especially following his marriage to Meghan, and on becoming a father.

Probably, he has never quite understood why he and his brother had to walk behind his mother’s hearse.

Probably, he has never quite understood why he could not have a good cry on the day.

Probably, he may have his own questions on what happened on that fateful night. He knows the paparazzi played their part but…

Probably, he replays the last conversation or time he had with his mother.

Probably he compares himself to his brother, the heir to the throne, miles now ahead of him in succession. Prince William seems to have it all together. Yet they suffered the same loss…

Prince William walked behind in the same funeral procession, has kept the stiff upper lip when need be, ticks all the boxes of royal pedigree on how to deal with personal crisis in the public eye.

Probably, ‘tender’ Harry was already sad even before his mother’s death following the acrimonious split and eventual divorce of his parents.

But can the Queen empathise with young Harry and his troubling soul?

The Queen would argue that she has had her fair share of trauma. She took the throne following the death of her father. Her father had died at a youngish age though not as tender as Diana (who was 36 at her death). Her father died at the age of 56.

The Queen had to deal with embarrassment and sadness seeing 3 of her 4 kids divorce not too long in their individual marriages.

In fact, 1992 was such a terrible year for the Queen, it is said she referred to the year as ‘annus horribilis’; Latin for horrible year.

The Queen also outlived her younger sister, yet that upper lip never quivered. No evidence of orders for royal psychiatric couches at any point of her 90 something plus years!

But we are all built differently. Harry is not William and vice versa. Harry is not the Queen and vice versa.

Harry truly knows how fragile or not his mental health may be.

And making the choice of escape, from the Royal Family, from England and all things familiar, may be his way of dealing with protecting his mental health and fears.

He did not choose the family he was born into it. But he has chosen a new path for his descendants.

Lets face it, his royal status gave him no protection from tragedy and ill mental health. And can offer no guarantees of these in future.

If Megxit is as a result of self care,then like everyone including their critics say, we wish them well.

If Megxit solves their pain and they are not ‘running away’, we wish them well.

For as my grandma would say, don’t run away from trouble. It only follows you.

However for now in the short term, prevention is better than cure. Let’s hope that the preventative measures they may have supposedly taken will not be a source of issues in future. Or exacerbate the current ones.

Or be a misguided decision? Or that Harry’s mental health is indeed so fragile that they have truly lost all sense of perspective?

Because as we all know the Paparazzi he hates, and one of the chief culprit for their escape, found themselves in France. They were not in England, on that sad fateful night of his mother.

Which means self care may take more than just changing post/zip codes.

Disclaimer. The opinions expressed in this post are entirely the author’s own. Defying Mental Illness respects the Crown and all members of the Royal family.

About The Author