60 Sec Confidence Building – So what is Normal?

I saw this the other day. “I’m not weird. I am a limited edition’.  Got to say I like it.   

Ed Miliband, UK politician responded to voters sometime back in 2011, that he was a ‘pretty normal guy’ after being regarded as weird due to comments about his voice and appearance. He said it was all in the eye of the beholder…apparently!

So what is normal then?

Dictionary.com states normal as:
1. Conforming to the standard or the common type; usual; not abnormal; regular; natural.
2. Psychology definition – approximately average in any psychological trait, as intelligence, personality, or emotional adjustment. Free from any mental disorder; sane.

So who determines normal? What makes one person normal and the other normal?

I can wear a coat on a sunny day. Another person might go sleeveless. Which of the two feelings is normal?  

I may get angry because someone drove dangerously in the traffic. Another person may just overlook it and smile. Which of the two reactions is normal?

I may have a baby that hardly ever cries. Another person may have a baby that cries nonstop. Which of the two babies is normal?

Who determines normal? What defines normal?  Our definition above says that which is the standard or common type. It means something that is regular or natural.

A lot of things however goes into determining standards. Culture, beliefs, background, race and even our education. What is normal for one person may not necessarily be so. Chuck and I come from slightly different cultural backgrounds for example. There are some things that acceptable in his culture, that I find bluntly rude, even by definition. And am sure the same is vice versa.

Similarly in some families. There are family traditions that mould the way they do certain things. Something that is common place and courteous in one family would be branded as rebellious in another.

 Even as Christians, denominations have created differences. I may worship in a way that may look or sound strange to the next person and vice versa. Which is the normal Christianity?

Again, my question, what is normal? Is the majority in figures and statistics what defines being normal? Most times yes, but not always. If the majority of people in a particular profession for example, were male, does that make the female that are in the profession, abnormal? I do not think so.

Which also leads me to asking is the opposite of normal, abnormal? Or are there three classifications… normal, not normal and abnormal?

We need to be careful how we are quick to label things, circumstances or people as not normal or even abnormal. Such labels can give room for discrimination and even makes the other party feel like an outcast. Of course when it comes to mental illness or even physical illness, we know the things that are outside the norms of science and the human body. Even so, doctors see variations for which they conclude that variation is normal for that particular patient. Someone may talk to himself a lot but maybe that is how he thinks aloud. Is that behaviour not normal?

If you tell me, I am not a normal person, especially character wise, even if you called me abnormal, I don’t think I would be bothered. Because I see myself as unique…perhaps a normal person would be offended?

I celebrate any differences I have from the next person. I don’t have to be part of the masses to feel normal or even part of a clique (but now I am digressing with the ‘clique’ issue. We will have to talk about that another time!).

I don’t feel I have to conform to a standard outside my beliefs. I am comfortable to stand out. For me personally, the Bible is my manual for describing who I am, what I conform my lifestyle to. (Interestingly enough, the Good Book says God’s kids are peculiar people. Hey ho, there is the license to be called not normal, lol!).

Now, I am not advocating that anything and everything is normal. However where morality, beliefs and values have ticked all the boxes, we must feel comfortable in who we are and likewise not be discriminatory towards others.  So what was that questions again…what is normal?

So lets do some normal tasks and share this post with your friends, or become one of valued friends and interactive followers on Twitter!

About The Author

Zoe

Zoe met Eze (Chuck) in the 14th year of what turned out to be an 18 year ‘journey’ with mental illness. They got married less than a year of meeting with Zoe fully knowing Chuck had a diagnosis of mental illness. In the 18th year, Chuck defied the odds of mental illness. A consultant psychiatrist signed him off the mental health system with a bill of NO MENTAL ILLNESS. The consultant was so amazed by Chuck’s astonishing recovery that he even questioned how Chuck was diagnosed with mental illness all those years before, in the first place! Today Chuck is free from medication, its dependency and hospitalizations. Zoe’s award nominated book, DEFYING THE ODDS, chronicles the highs and ‘lows’ of this journey. Zoe, often writing from the standpoint of a caregiver, clearly understands that mental illness does not only affect an individual challenged with the disease, but also families, marriages and society as a whole.

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