Anger: Self-Punishment For Another’s Mistake
Anger is often the punishment we give ourselves for the mistake of others. Let’s say I am driving and another driver cuts in front of me at a junction.
I have the choice to be angry and upset or to not to let it affect me. In choosing anger I let the action of another drive my response. In choosing not to be angry, I drive the direction of events by channeling events in the direction decided by me.
Before the event that may have caused me anger occurred, I may have well have had plans. The events affecting me could result from someone not understanding the impact on me. They could also result from someone seeking to stop my particular line of action.
The Good Book says “Be angry but do not sin”. I translate this as “recognise that something is wrong but do not let your emotions drive your response.” Anger has a stressful effect on our bodies. When it is vented in destructive action we are actually punishing ourselves and the object of our anger.
Zoe was talking the other day about the impact of unexpected change on ourselves. Most often we react rather than respond. We react when by negative emotions within us. This only feeds the destructive forces within. We respond from thinking through. Consider the lessons from the event- and not the effect on your emotions.
Where your thoughts go your body follows. It is difficult to relax from an angry state. Very often our reaction leads to an escalation of the very thing we are angry over. The amplified effect of our anger often results in our actions not being coherent. Ability to observe is seriously curtailed in anger as memory gets affected. Concentration becomes a rapid victim in our reaction to anger.
If we are not careful, chronic borderline disorder or similar may result. We punish ourselves for things not going the way we desire them to. Insecurity can then push us into being control freaks.
More on this topic later!