Keeping A Healthy Relationship With Social Media

By Jenn Mullin

Now more than ever we can communicate on the go. Due to the popularization of the mobile device, we now have the worlds knowledge at our figure tips.

Social media has revolutionised our world.  Not only are we able to enrich our own lives through the utilization of such technology, now we have the privilege of sharing our experiences with others with apps such as Facebook, and in real time too!

But when is enough, enough? And can using social media be detrimental to your metal health?

You Are Being Impacted Through Social Comparison

Social comparison existed before social media, but it was only limited to the people you met in person, and you could make a much more detailed judgment about these individuals.

One could see or hear flaws and struggles, as well as triumphs, making social comparison a more acceptable (albeit still unhealthy) practice.

Think about the pictures you see and your thoughts surrounding them. Everyone else seems to be doing something interesting, and most people don’t realize that for every person they see posting vacation photos, there are a hundred people who aren’t.

This leads to unsafe comparisons, where people compare their happiness to others’ perceived happiness.

Image Crafting Is an Unseen Art

When you look at a news feed or a social media page, people don’t realize they’re not seeing everything.

Even the more negative matters are portrayed through a lens of sarcasm and usually fall into the category of life’s daily problems.  Yet things such as self-doubt, emotional issues, and traumatic experiences are usually not talked about at anything more than a surface level.

People will talk more extensively about a new relationship or an amazing vacation as opposed to a break-up or a period of personal uncertainty.

People, in their efforts to garner attention and a positive representation, will put their best online foot forward; they want to look impressive.

They will spend time (or waste time, depending on how one looks at it) to receive a boost to their self-esteem. Much like how photos of models are airbrushed, profiles are similarly sculpted.

Image Crafting Is an Unseen Art

When you look at a news feed or a social media page, people don’t realize they’re not seeing everything.

Even the more negative matters are portrayed through a lens of sarcasm and usually fall into the category of life’s daily problems.

Yet things such as self-doubt, emotional issues, and traumatic experiences are usually not talked about at anything more than a surface level. People will talk more extensively about a new relationship or an amazing vacation as opposed to a break-up or a period of personal uncertainty.

People, in their efforts to garner attention and a positive representation will put their best online foot forward, wanting to look impressive.

They’ll spend time (or waste time, depending on how one looks at it) to receive a boost to their self-esteem. Much like how photos of models are airbrushed, profiles are similarly sculpted.

Constant Tracking Can Have Adverse Effects

Some of us might feel like we’re never separated from our technology or our need to update others of our lives.

Our actions are constantly being watched and tracked by our devices, and that can impose an otherwise unwanted burden on us, making our failures more difficult and raising suspicions in others.

Corporations might also use social media to market to us, trying to take advantage of weaknesses we might see in ourselves.

While you can prevent some of the more technical aspects of tracking your location by using a VPN or a proxy, you’ll also want to be careful about what you share online.

People can’t judge you (nor should they) about what you do or don’t put up, and it’s your right to share as much or as little of your life as you wish.

Cyberbullying and Negative Commentary

While it often happens in younger circles and on some platforms more than others, the effects of cyberbullying are well-known and can have long-term, adverse effects on an individual’s self-esteem.

The constant negative commentary that occurs on these sites can also affect one’s mind, even when the commentary isn’t directed at the reader. Given the current setup on the internet, most cyberbullying happens on social media platforms, and people need to be prepared for this.

If you or some you know know you is being cyberbullied, take immediate action to block them, and, if the severity of the situation calls for it, contact the authorities. People’s self-esteem is not worth second chances in these cases; the situation can be avoided.

If you have the suspicion that your child is partaking or experiencing bullying, here are a few tips that may guide them in the right direction:

##1 Don’t only monitor the quantity of time that your kids and teens spend on social accounts. The quality of the social media activities that they engage in can clearly impact their self-esteem and well-being. Both the quantity and quality of time spent online are important.

##2 Encourage your kids to engage in positive social media activities, such as viewing their own profiles or fostering their interests.

##3 Let your kids know that they should take what they see on their social media feeds with a grain of salt. To some degree, everyone reflects the good in their lives and filters out all the negative stuff in their profiles.

The Positives

Like many things, social media usage is about balance. There are many benefits to using social media, and when utilized correctly, can be large part of self-esteem solutions for all ages, including children. For example:

##1 Social media is an amazing educational tool. Where would our lives be without Google?  Resources are at our fingertips, teachers can easily communicate and collaborate with students, social media platforms are essential to discuss educational topics and talk about school assignments.

##2 Young people access social media to join a community and get emotional support from like-minded individuals to help address or prevent mental health issues. Conversations can give young people much-needed interactions that helps them overcome difficult health issues in situations where they don’t have face-to-face contact.

##3 Social media is a platform for self-identity and self-expression—important aspects of a person’s development through their teens. These platforms allow young people to express who they are, as they are evolving and developing a comfortable sense of self. That includes creativity, innovation, and entrepreneurship. They can join communities with like-minded people who represent their identity as people.

##4 Young people are honing different skills through social media use that will help them later in life. They can operate freely over different social media platforms, meaning a seamless transition into the workforce later on.

##5 Creating, nurturing, and solidifying relationships with friends and family, some of whom live far away—in many instances people who would otherwise be contacted less frequently. Strong adolescent friendships are strengthened further by social media interaction. Interaction via social media after an initial meeting can create the foundation of a long-lasting relationship.

An Emphasis on Connection Can Be Helpful

One of the things that can help our sense of self-esteem is the feeling we have a legitimate and emotional connection to the people in our lives that we care about. Social media, and the internet in general, has allowed us to maintain these connections more easily.

While cyberbullying and a constant stream of abusive messages create problems, being able to contact a support network and understand that there are people to confide in is likely to be helpful.

Exposure to empathetic individuals and other people who are otherwise hard to reach can be beneficial to the future.

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Author Bio

Jenn is a freelance writer, focusing on social, economic, and political issues. Her inspiration is writing about topics which provoke thought and start conversations surrounding important and controversial issues.

The views and opinions expressed in this post are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect all or some of our beliefs and policy.  Any links on this page do not necessarily mean they have been endorsed by Defying Mental Illness.

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