Surviving or Thriving?

The theme for this year’s Mental Health Awareness Week is Surviving or Thriving.
I am sure if you asked people what they’s rather have in life, I would think they’d choose to obviously thrive. But some people have been through such trauma in life, they are just grateful to be alive. For these perhaps they’d be happy to survive.
What do these words mean however? I googled the two words and here’s what I found.

To survive means:

• Continue to live or exist, especially in spite of danger or hardship.
• Continue to live or exist in spite of (an accident or ordeal).
• Remain alive after the death of (a particular person).
• Manage to keep going in difficult circumstances.

To thrive means

• Prosper; flourish.

When one is surviving or on survival mode, you tend to:

• Survival mode is about whatever will be will be
• We are more reactive than proactive when surviving
• We are happy to stay in a comfort zone…after all they are grateful something works
• Tendency may be to live in the past as the future is scary and unknown
• Life is seen as more getting by
• We can easily get stuck in this mode

There is no discounting that getting past terrible ordeals and trauma in life such as war and abuse can affect one psychologically and mentally. The plan however is to ease of survival mode and embrace life again.
The Bible says in John 10:10 (Amplified): I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance [to the full, till it overflows].
So there is a plan that God expects us to embrace and enjoy life. This life must be so enjoyable that it overflows. However, this does not apply to just when things are going well but in spite of our challenges.
The truth is that Jesus said that life would have its share of troubles, persecution and problems. “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” – John 16:33 NIV
We are to take heart and live an overcoming life because through Him there will be peace among the storm. And this is what thriving mode does. The palm tree is one piece of nature that shows what it means to thrive in the midst of tsunamis of life. The Bible says we are to flourish, i.e. thrive, like the palm tree.
A palm tree has the following qualities:

• They flourish (not survive) in storms and hurricanes
• They do not snap but have a deep root system. They in fact benefit storms! Having been beaten by the storm they grow stronger and taller.
• They hold a good posture during those trying times. They may bend to such extent even touching the ground.

How to thrive

Receive peace. Jesus said He came to offer us peace. Make up your mind that life is for enjoying. Life is for living. And living is very different from surviving.
For Chuck and I, we can never discount the value of our faith in Chuck’s complete recovery from mental illness, defying the odds of the disease.
What you say is also important. So make sure you ‘confess’ the right things into your life. Meditate on the Word and on the right things. If you keep meditating on negative things, it will affect you.
Seek help. No one is an island. Talk to someone. Get professional help. Talk to your pastor or leader. Don’t keep it bottled inside. Silence is an enemy when it comes to mental illness!
Declutter some things. There are some things you are going to have to get rid of, in order to move out of survival mode. These include hanging out with the wrong friends or just people who are not motivated to get of survival mode themselves. Find thrivers. Find people who motivate you. Set a mentor or coach if need be.
Your strengths and passions are unearthed in storms. It is also important to realize that there is always energy in a storm. Storms stir up things. See the storms of life as opportunities for growth. Writing a book, Defying the Odds, and also Chuck and I starting this organisation, Defying Mental Illness was a step in the right direction. We turned our test into a testimony. We made lemonade out of the lemons that were thrown at us.
When you come out of survival mode, you will discover the new ‘you’. Let the new ‘you’ be excited and not apprehensive. Nurture this person. Invest in this person.
And thrive!

About The Author

Zoe

Zoe met Eze (Chuck) in the 14th year of what turned out to be an 18 year ‘journey’ with mental illness. They got married less than a year of meeting with Zoe fully knowing Chuck had a diagnosis of mental illness. In the 18th year, Chuck defied the odds of mental illness. A consultant psychiatrist signed him off the mental health system with a bill of NO MENTAL ILLNESS. The consultant was so amazed by Chuck’s astonishing recovery that he even questioned how Chuck was diagnosed with mental illness all those years before, in the first place! Today Chuck is free from medication, its dependency and hospitalizations. Zoe’s award nominated book, DEFYING THE ODDS, chronicles the highs and ‘lows’ of this journey. Zoe, often writing from the standpoint of a caregiver, clearly understands that mental illness does not only affect an individual challenged with the disease, but also families, marriages and society as a whole.

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