The Reasons Why we do not set Goals
John Maxwell in his book, Be All You Can Be, said research shows that approximately 95 percent of us have never written out our goals in life, but of the 5% who have, 95 % have achieved their goals. In 1953 at Yale University, 3% of the graduating class had specific written goals for their lives. In 1975, researchers found that the 3% who wrote their goals had accomplished more than the other 97% put together!
Staggering findings, shocking even, but it shows that setting goals has a lot in predicting where we will be in future. For me personally, I do not like stumbling out of bed and ‘let the day happen to me’. I remember when Chuck and I got married. I would ask him what his plans were for the day. He would look at me like I had just said a flying saucer had landed in our back garden. Thankfully, I do not get the look quite so much these days!
For me, I’d rather let ‘me’ happen to my day. And the way I can do this is by having goals and plans for the day. In the past, especially, I used to find I could get irritated and even stressed when I was overwhelmed by the activities of the day. However, by purposely setting out my goals for the day, I reduced stress in my life, drastically, and I can say drastically.
And by the way, I am one busy bee in life, to include being a wife, mother, daughter, employee, business owner, a minister of the Gospel, investor, teacher, writer…just to name a few. And I aim to be effective in all of these, not allowing any to suffer on account of the other. So I am sold out on this goal setting, else I am sunk!
If we want to cut down or even eliminate stress in our lives and improve our mental health, goal setting cannot be ignored. But while everyone tells us to set goals, and in our heart it is not a Eureka discovery, do we really, really know why we don’t set goals in the first place? It might help us to know in order to maintain the momentum of goal setting….
##1 We are overwhelmed
There is this big project to do that has a tight deadline. There are so many factors that need to be considered. There is the budget to look into. There is also reduction in head count for the work ahead. The task looks bigger than you can handle. You have all the pieces of the jigsaw but which piece do you pick up first? When we are overwhelmed, sometimes we can just go into freeze mode. Our mind is processing too many things all at once, and that causes us to even panic, shut down, resulting in us doing…nada…nothing.
This was me to some extent, when I first entered the work world. I always knew ‘me’ to be a very organised person. So when my boss, gave me an average mark for my organisational skills, I was horrified! She even went further in putting me on a planning course. Me? Moi? Ich? Could not believe it. The truth is, I was overwhelmed and did not even know it. I was trying to do it all at the same time, my work plan was essentially a maze, and I was not being very productive as I could be as a result. I needed to plan my day effectively instead.
##2 We do not have a clear picture of where we are heading
Sometimes the situation is quite the opposite of being overwhelmed. We have the headlines but not the story. We just don’t have the details, or do not even know how to go about getting the details. We sit and wait thinking the details will drop like manna from the sky. We want to be rich and that’s about it. No goals set however to achieving our wealth. Living in hope is good, but hope has cousins and has workers like faith and action respectively. If we do not have the jigsaw pieces or have quite a few missing, we can find that we just don’t do a thing!
##3 Fear
That four letter word, often comes up. Fear is crippling and affects us in every way. Fear arises because we are not confident about what needs to be done, think we are not the right person for the job, or think we are not qualified to do what lies ahead. Fear arises because we do not want to take ‘risks’.
OK, we did not finish university, so we think to ourselves why should one even set goals for the next 5 years? Is it not better to wait and see what opportunities will come knocking on our front door? Not quite.
Opportunities are attracted to those that are ready, usually people with goals and dreams. Else, when opportunities come, you would not even know they are opportunities. And believe me, opportunities often come disguised as challenges. So the challenge of flunking your degree, may be an opportunity for you somewhere else…now did you think about that?
##4 We do not want to change
How adaptable are we to change? Goal setting may involve us making changes to ourselves, our lives, even our attitudes. Sometimes, being in our comfort zone, prevents us from doing a lot of things in life, goal setting one of them. In order to take on a project, might mean doing an evening class, studying a new language.
We need to be prepared to embrace change for effective goal setting and planning. Change does not wait for others to change first before we change. Change does not wait for our environment to change…we change our environment.
##5 Lack of motivation
In an organisation, people may be motivated to set goals because there is some reward or incentive. But when there is no reward and/or when you do not self motivate yourself, goal setting can be an uphill struggle.
Also fear of failure can be an annoying de-motivator. That four letter word again, fear!
##6 Have too many other goals
Life is about levels. Growth is about levels. Some people can take on several goals all at once and be effective in all of them. I mentioned earlier, I do several things now. However, like Rome, that did not come in a day. It came with increase in grace and ability, but also a lot of discipline, learning from some big errors and also a lot of sacrifice too… Not forgetting learning to prioritize too!! If your level, is such that you can effectively set two major goals in your life, perfect these before moving to dealing with three.
##7 We don’t know how
Sometimes we just don’t know how to set our goals. Sometimes we are too specific or rigid, with no room for flexibility. Sometimes our ‘goals’ are too vague. Sometimes, we do not set realistic goals. And all these are subjective and individual. What is unrealistic to you, may be realistic to me! We may also not review our goals. Or may be setting goals for the wrong reason too! If we want to be rich only to prove to a family member that we made it, we could end up even frustrated, or find that your goal quickly has an expiry date. And when this happens, it can leave us frustrated to set future goals.
##8 We are lazy or not disciplined enough
If we are brutally honest with ourselves, one reason we do not set goals or even goals in some areas of our lives is because we are lazy. I don’t think I can mince the words because it is true. We can’t really be bothered. We are not disciplined enough at the start of the day, week or year to outline our goals of what we want to achieve. And if we do, we can’t even remember what we planned. If we wrote it down, can’t remember where we did! And if we did, we really cannot be asked to follow up on our own goals. Or sometimes we just procrastinate. Goal setting takes discipline.
There are some that say we should not set goals. They have all the theories as to why it is a waste of time. But it can only be a waste of time because of the reasons above. If we deal with the reasons above then we can easily set goals. The Bible says we are to pen our vision. So it is wise to set goals.
Remember, we all have a purpose here in life. In knowing we are here on planet earth because we are vitally needed, it helps us to define goals for ourselves, our lives, work and things concerning us. It motivates us to face another day. It helps us to keep keeping on even when faced with life’s blows.
The 3% Harvard students that set goals were in the same university as the other 97%. So, we can’t blame our environment. (Oh yes, we always want to cast the blame on someone or something, right?). However what was the difference between the two groups? The 3% must have clearly known what they wanted out of life. Most of us ‘think we know’ what we want in life, think we know our purpose in life, rather than actually ‘know’. And the rest don’t know at all. Therein lies the clue as to maintaining the momentum of goal setting.
Have you set out your goals for today?
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