What TO SAY to someone challenged with Mental Illness
Often we can end up putting our foot in our mouth when we don’t want to. It is not that people intend to be mean and making derogatory statements regarding mental illness, however, people usually are ignorant of the disease and even how to handle it.
Here are some pointers on things what to say to someone with mental illness instead of pushing the person off further:
##1 I do not understand the disease very well. Could you explain it to me
Often we have our own preconceived ideas about what bipolar, depression or any mental illness is. Some of perceptions come from movies, what others have told us or what we have thought up in our minds. Most times these are not exactly right either. So asking someone to explain what they are going through, more of the disease and so on, at least puts you on a level where you can begin to see and understand better. Getting information about whether they are seeing a doctor or counselor, or if they are on medication shows that you are interested in their welfare.
##2 Is there anything I can do to help? Perhaps help with the kids, shopping?
Your friend, colleague, family member may be finding it challenging to cope even with the day to day activities of life because of mental illness. Ask how you can be of help. If you say an area where you know they definitely need help, then be more specific.
Here are a few examples of help that could be rendered:
They may be feeling exhausted with the shopping because of the side effects of medication, so you can offer to help with driving or maybe going along with them shopping
The kids may be missing out on mummy’s delight, help with their homework, or kicking football. You can offer to bake a cake that the kids would love, take them to the park, and so on.
It could be something even as simple as reminding them when to pick up their prescriptions.
##3 I am here for you
If someone has been brave enough to open up to you about their challenged with mental illness or you have found out one way or the other, they may be very concerned or anxious about whether their relationship with friends and family would stand the test of time. The Bible says there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother (Proverbs 18:24). You don’t need to be blood related, to show your loyalty. It is not the time to start doing a stage exit right. So, once you give them the reassurance that you are still their buddy, even that you still love them, make sure you mean it and hang around even if the going gets tougher.
##4 I am praying for you
As a Christian, offering prayer can be very comforting and reassuring to the hearer. Prayer brings comfort and prayer goes a long way in bringing solutions and healing, so make sure you do pray after you said that. Only prayers that are made, can be answered!
Offer hope and do not be a prophet of doom.
##5 Remember the non verbal communication too
Sometimes the right words may just not come. Silence can be golden but you don’t want those awkward moments where the silence is defeaning!
So how about offering a hug? Even studies show the power of a hug especially with those challenged with schizophrenia. A hug communicates so much. A hug says that you don’t think they are now ‘contagious’, unloved, that they are to be ashamed of themselves, and so on.
Remember words uplift or words pull down. Avoid at all costs that which creates mental illness stigma and discrimination. The usual, ‘snap out of it, or pull yourself together‘ talk. Bite your tongue (literally) than spit those kind of words out. Let’s build a happier world with kind words.
If you want to see an end to stigma and discrimination of mental illness please share this post on your social media. Thank you!
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